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Perks of Being Over 60
Posted By: Bill Helmich
Date: Friday, 8 May 2009, at 7:11 p.m.
Perks of reaching 60 + And heading Beyond 70!
1... Kidnappers are not very interested in you.
2. In a hostage situation, you are likely to be
3. No one expects you to run -- anywhere.
4. People call at 9 PM and ask, 'Did I wake you?'
5.. People no longer view you as a hypochondriac.
6. There is nothing left to learn the hard way.
7. Things you buy now won't wear out.
8. You can eat supper at 4 PM.
9. You can live 'without ##### but not your glasses.
10. You get into heated arguments about pension plans.
11. You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge.
12. You quit trying to hold your stomach in
no matter who walks into the room.
13. You sing along with elevator music.
14. Your eyes won't get much worse.
15. Your investment in health insurance is finally beginning to pay off.
16. Your joints are more accurate meteorologists than the national weather service.
17.. Your secrets are safe with your friends because they can't remember them either.
18. Your supply of braincells is finally down to
a manageable size.
19. You can't remember who sent you this list.
20. And you notice these are all in big print
for your convenience.
ONE MORE THING: never, under any cir#####stances,
take a sleeping pill, and a laxative on the same night!
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